I woke up this morning and Drew and I drove to our ultrasound appointment. I knew if everything was ok, this would be our last one with Dr. B and his staff. I was nervous. I have been feeling more nauseous lately, and tired as well, ok, and emotional...but I was mostly nervous just praying that everything was ok. There was no reason to feel or think that it wasn't ok, but still, the nerves.
It was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. He then when on to measure how big it is and told me that "it's not starving" which I guess means it's growing. haha. Then we heard the heartbeat again, and it was perfectly on schedule with 9 1/2 weeks. The baby was squirming so much that he had a hard time getting a picture of it at first. He showed us the 2 hemispheres of the brain and how they are growing. He showed us where the spine is developing. He showed us the umbilical cord. In MY body, right now, there is an umbilical cord! Attached to a BABY! He said everything looks great. Other great news was that I'm almost done taking my estrogen and progesterone SO excited about that as those are not fun to take. It was a great exam and I remembered to ask all my questions. It looks like I've gained a little weight through this process (DUH--I'm basically not moving EVER and eating whatever sounds good) but he said not to worry about that. So I will take that advice and finish my Strawberry shake from Coldstone that I asked my awesome husband to get me. He's pretty great. So was the strawberry shake.
After the exam we walked out to the lobby and heard graduation music. We have graduated from the fertility clinic. I can't believe it.
We said our goodbyes and they said there's a place for our baby picture on the wall and we'd better keep in touch. He told us they have a repossess policy if we don't visit and we laughed. Then we lingered in the office for a few more minutes because after all of this it seems strange to leave. But there really was nothing else, so we said our last goodbyes and shut the door on that chapter of our lives. Goodbye infertility.
We got to the car and were beside ourselves with joy. We just laughed and cried and praised God and cried more. You guys, I can't explain to you as I write this in tears, how it felt to see a living being inside my body...kick...kick..kicking. Drew and I are still beside ourselves. I know we aren't out of the woods yet, and that this is still the first trimester, and blah blah blah...but I have today. Today I have life living inside of me. Today MY baby that is INSIDE of ME was KICKING KICKING KICKING! One of the most amazing days of my life that I thought I would never have.
humbled...joyous...in awe...blessed...remembered...
3 comments:
Just wait until you start to feel those kick-kick-kickings, AMAZING!!
I'll say it again - I wish we could "like" blog posts :) So happy for you!!
Your baby in the ultrasound looks a little like a squished, rather full HEART! :^) AR
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