Monday, February 04, 2013

Wiggles on Graduation Day!

I was away for a long weekend with college girls as Laura and I ministered at a conference in the UP of MI.  It was an AMAZING weekend in so many ways.  I was a little afraid of going as it was 6 hours away from home and from my dr., but God was SO faithful this weekend. Laura pampered me and wouldn't let me walk 5 steps without holding my arm in that crazy 4 feet of snow up there. We also drove everywhere so no chance of slipping!  I was also scared to speak for 45 minutes as I'm usually expressive and I didn't want to do anything too expressive for fear of over doing it with my body.  But I felt great on stage.  I felt great all weekend.  I even got to take a a nice little nap next to this amazing fire that I made.   It was great.

I woke up this morning and Drew and I drove to our ultrasound appointment. I knew if everything was ok, this would be our last one with Dr. B and his staff.  I was nervous. I have been feeling more nauseous lately, and tired as well, ok, and emotional...but I was mostly nervous just praying that everything was ok. There was no reason to feel or think that it wasn't ok, but still, the nerves.

The staff is so nice there.  As soon as we got there they led us into the normal ultrasound room where we got ready. Dr. B came in and asked me if my team one the superbowl.  The regular chit-chat went on and then we started the exam. From the moment anything was on the screen we saw a little, tiny baby leg kicking, kicking kicking!!!!! We were so shocked! I think even Dr. B was surprised.  Drew was shuffling to get his camera out and I think he started crying. I'm not sure because my eyes were totally fixed on the screen.  I had NO intention of seeing a baby leg, let alone see it KICK-KICK-KICK!!!!
It was the most amazing thing I've ever seen.  He then when on to measure how big it is and told me that "it's not starving" which I guess means it's growing. haha.  Then we heard the heartbeat again, and it was perfectly on schedule with 9 1/2 weeks.  The baby was squirming so much that he had a hard time getting a picture of it at first. He showed us the 2 hemispheres of the brain and how they are growing. He showed us where the spine is developing.  He showed us the umbilical cord. In MY body, right now, there is an umbilical cord! Attached to a BABY! He said everything looks great.  Other great news was that I'm almost done taking my estrogen and progesterone  SO excited about that as those are not fun to take. It was a great exam and I remembered to ask all my questions. It looks like I've gained a little weight through this process (DUH--I'm basically not moving EVER and eating whatever sounds good) but he said not to worry about that. So I will take that advice and finish my Strawberry shake from Coldstone that I asked my awesome husband to get me. He's pretty great. So was the strawberry shake. 

After the exam we walked out to the lobby and heard graduation music.  We have graduated from the fertility clinic.  I can't believe it.

We said our goodbyes and they said there's a place for our baby picture on the wall and we'd better keep in touch. He told us they have a repossess policy if we don't visit and we laughed. Then we lingered in the office for a few more minutes because after all of this it seems strange to leave. But there really was nothing else, so we said our last goodbyes and shut the door on that chapter of our lives. Goodbye infertility.

We got to the car and were beside ourselves with joy. We just laughed and cried and praised God and cried more. You guys, I can't explain to you as I write this in tears, how it felt to see a living being inside my body...kick...kick..kicking.  Drew and I are still beside ourselves. I know we aren't out of the woods yet, and that this is still the first trimester, and blah blah blah...but I have today.  Today I have life living inside of me. Today MY baby that is INSIDE of ME was KICKING KICKING KICKING! One of the most amazing days of my life that I thought I would never have.

humbled...joyous...in awe...blessed...remembered...

3 comments:

SouleSista said...

Just wait until you start to feel those kick-kick-kickings, AMAZING!!

Anna said...

I'll say it again - I wish we could "like" blog posts :) So happy for you!!

Anonymous said...

Your baby in the ultrasound looks a little like a squished, rather full HEART! :^) AR