10 days

There are times in life when you look back on 10 days and wonder how I could have been so blind. Yet, i guess i couldn't have known what God was going to do. But maybe I should have trusted Him a bit more.

I wasn't looking forward to the things that were going to happen on this past trip of 10 days. I remember having a horrible attitude, yet feeling happy to be on the road. Some days, while i am in the midst of my selfishness, i long to just keep traveling with out stops. Feeling comfortable in my sheltered home. But from the first stop, setting up our sound at Byron's church, things started to seem..different.

We stayed with people this past week, who were so giving. they not only let us stay in their home, but gave us a vehicle to use the entire week, let us hook our bus up to their house, fed us everyday, gave us stuff, and just blessed us with conversations over hot tubs and guitars. It was just a blessing, and I found myself still with a bad attitude, but feeling grateful in the midst of it.

I must say, i wasn't looking forward to the CIY meetings, the OTB meetings, or the Birthright project that we were to perform on Friday. There were lots of people to talk to, and much to achomplish, and i just felt tired. You know, that tiredness you get when your spirit just feels spiteful. But every place God took me, he would bless me over and over. We received a donation this past week. $5000. We needed money to pay our health insurance and it couldn't have come at a better time. We are still without pay however, but i know God will provide. He is so good to us.

CIY was great to us too. They were really coming to us wanting a fresh look at things. I found that something i couldn't be mad at. It's not that i don't like CIY, but I just felt crappy about the whole thing. can't really say why. It felt strange being there, but they blessed us. And i felt stupid when i left, trying to weigh through my personal feelings and bad mood, and what God actually wanted me to take away from that.

The rest of the week was the same way. God sending words, time, and people to bless me. It was amazing to watch Him bless me dispite my attitude. Then there was Birthright. Drew was so in tune during the rehearsals. He was in his element for sure. He directed and worked on the flats, and was a key person in the rehearsals and how it tycnically went together. even though i didn't see him much, it was great to watch him enjoying his work. It reminded me of how we each have our own place. like i loved writing Birthright. I don't mind performing it, but directing? not my thing really. But drew not only was good at it, he LOVED it. He loved having a goal and reaching that goal.

Once Birthright started, I could feel God's presence there, and I was thankful. The program went great. there were a few glitches, but over all, it was so Spirit filled. During each piece I looked out across the audience to watch people respond with laughter, agreement, and tears. When we started communion, almost every person who was in my line was crying. It was so touching. I didn't realize what this program would do to people. But it moved them. In deep ways. One woman told me afterwards she had never worshipped that way before. another told me she knew God wanted her to come to this conference for something, and she had the most intimate moment with Him that she had ever had. Birthright. I would have never guessed it. But i had the priviledge to watch God reveal my vision for Birthright. Many things happened the exact way I had envisioned them when we wrote Birthright. I woke up Saturday morning knowing my drama conference experience wasn't over yet, just feeling thankful. I cried as i opened my eyes to a new morning of realization that God had been blessing me for the past 7 days. He loves me. and even in the midst of my ornery attitude, He blesses. Just like the Isrealites. I constantly find myself relating to them. I hate that, but it is true.

the blessings weren't over though, we were previledged to perform drama during the conference and everyone seemed to love our new way of performing. Most of the drama's at the conference are what you would normally see during a church service. They were a bit churchy. Not that it is bad, but it is just different from what we do. It just felt good to be accepted.

We left there and headed to Carthage MO where we set up (late) and spent the night in the bus. We were all really tired, but got up the next day to perform at the Sunday morning service. We had to teach a class though and we weren't really sure what to do. But it all worked out well, as it always does and the congregation loved our drama's. it was a crazy show because most of the audience were older people. uh..i think drew calls them geriatrics. But they were great and even loved our drums. :)

at any rate, i didn't really mean for this entry to be a play by play of my ten days, but rather a glimps of how God worked despite my humanness.

We are on our way home now. It was laura's last trip which i have been avoiding the thought of not having her. She will be missed. And i fear not having her around. things will seem empty, but God will fill the voids. It has been a great 10 days. and I pray the next 10 (dispite my not wanting to be at home) are filled with even more blessings from the Lord.